When you work for an advisor who acts more like a dad than a boss sometimes, you tend to pick up a few more nurturing characteristics than your peers. In some strange turn of events, I have been lovingly named “Lab Mom.”
These are my confessions to the undergrads
1. Graduate students talk about their undergrads
Much like how dance moms compete with their kids, so too do grad students do with their undergrads. Maybe not to the point of screaming, but we definitely know whose undergrads are contaminating cells and whose undergrads are quantifying a terabyte of data for publication next year.
Obviously everyone knows I have the most interesting group.
2. Your work is totally the foundation for my dissertation.
I came to ND without having done the majority of the experiments I had to teach. But at least we can work together to make me look like a competant biologist.
Until now…I’ll just keep building off of what I learn by watching y’all drug treat cells, euthanize mice, and perform microscopy experiments.
shhhh no one mention that one time I added acid to water during our ELISA.
3. I check your experiments and prepare for the worst
The first time I did cell culture, the older grad student had a cell line on the side in case I screwed up. Ever since then, I have adopted the nature of checking on your cell lines, your tissue stains, whatever it is you needed.
I also have prepped more DNA and made more solutions on the side, just in case everything falls apart.
4. I love dropping my entire schedule to fit your experiment or your study breaks in to my day
Sitting in the basement all day, with little to no life around you, can get pretty boring. So when I hear that one of y’all is coming by to do an experiment or whatever, I just shift my entire schedule. I’m going to be in lab regardless, so I might as well have some fun.
5. I’ve definitely used the excuse, “my undergrads need me.”
When people ask me what would happen if I don’t come in to lab, I describe the PFA incident as if this happened:
6. Putting up a live video feed is still under consideration
7. Remembering 12 different students’ schedules, experiments, and lives is a lot harder than it looks like.
I still get a little antsy when I remember the Friday when I had to plate 20 flasks for TA, teach one girl to make media, teach another how to use the fix I’m scared of, and one of the guys came in just to say hi all at once.
Fun facts: the cells died, the media was messed up, and the imaging failed.
But no worries, I cleaned up later
8. You are way cooler than me.
No matter what Ryan Gosling says…my life is not all that interesting. If you care about lysosome tubulation, then my daily life would be fascinating. It’s not that my life is boring.I love being in the basement 80 hours a week and going on random adventures whenever someone asks me to leave the basement.
But if no one is free to adventure, you have to find a form of entertainment
When you have 12 undergrads, who are all involved in many different things and have personalities that you can’t even make up, well you can live vicariously through them.
9. When y’all don’t come in, I get a lot done. But it sucks.
10. I’m still in denial that I’m losing 8 out of the 12 in a few weeks.
I know graduation and moving in to new labs is a thing, and I celebrate those things. It’s just weird to think that I won’t be providing freshly autoclaved pipete tips, life chats, or general entertainment to 8 of y’all.
To the seniors, I wish y’all the very best. Thank y’all for helping me make this lab a second home for me at Notre Dame. Thank y’all for putting up with me when I am stressed, way too excited about lysosomes, or pursuing my PhD in Comedy instead of Biology.
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