Settling For Less

I settled.

You settled.

We’re all settling, and we aren’t even noticing it.

What does it mean to settle? My Dear Readers by now should know that I am not one for looking in to the dictionary to give a definition, so I will share the essence of “settling” instead. Settling is when we choose to accept what is in front of us, even if we know that it is less than what we or the other party involved deserves.

Did you catch it?

In order to settle, we need two parties with a goal in mind. When we settle, we come to an agreement with that other party, accepting some in-between goal that rarely reflects what we or the other person deserves.

We settle for less, and as a result, we force the other party to settle for less as well.

Why do we settle?

I think we choose to settle because we are afraid. We’re not so much afraid of what would happen if we didn’t take the deal, so much as we are afraid that there would be serious consequences if we went for what we really wanted. We fear losing what we already have, and so we settle for less than what we should have in the end.

We see this in legal cases where a large corporation takes a settlement instead of going to court for fear of losing more money. The individuals affected receive some compensation, but there is little justice in that.

We see this in relationships when someone is so down on their luck that they just accept the person right in front of them. The potential for true love is lost, and both parties are hurt.

We see this in young scientists who just do what they are told, never making up their own hypotheses. Ideas are lost, and the mentor losing energy from having to be creative for two people instead of one.

The act of settling goes far deeper than just in the simple exterior activities I briefly mentioned here.

We settle for less because we are afraid to believe in something more.

This is true for both the believer and the non-believer. I could speak to the tragedy of not believing in something more from the non-believer perspective, but I think it is the lack of faith from the believers that is making it so difficult for the non-believers to ever accept faith in to their hearts. Even though we know that God has created everything for us, we still lack the faith to believe that He can and will do everything to make our lives as joyful as they can be. Without accepting that joy, the non-believers cannot see why a life of faith would be any different from the lives they are living now.

And without something more…It would be hard to believe that there is much worth to the lives we are living anyways.

Why are we so afraid to believe that there really could be more for us in this life than what we are seeing right in this very moment?

We stopped believing that miracles could happen.

“Tell me,” Fr. Chris said one Monday afternoon, “How is your prayer life?”

I was taken aback by the question. I had already told Fr. Chris that I prayed for everyone in my life, whether I spoke to them or not. The act of praying for others, intercessory prayer, has been a part of my life ever since I was a little girl. I prayed for people, especially my enemies, because I wanted them to know that God loved them and that everything was going to be ok.

Miracles happen in response to these prayers.

Love comes in where it never was before, and that alone is a miracle. Anything other than the increased love in my community was an added bonus from God.

But I had stopped praying about my own heart.

I settled.

Why did I settle? I settled because I stopped believing that my prayers would allow God to work miracles in my own life. For most of my life, I had seen miracles in response to prayer, whether it be my own or the prayer of another. I didn’t believe that miracles weren’t possible; I just stopped hoping that they would happen for me. After all, there was a point in time when I thought my Jesus had finally answered my prayers, and it all came crashing down around me.

Like many Christians, I allowed the world to permeate in to my heart. Because my Jesus cares for the poor and lowly, I had little reason to ask for His help…at least that’s what I told myself.

That just isn’t true.

Dear Reader, Our God created everything around us. His imagination is boundless, and His creation is perfect. Whatever it is that we dream of, He can dream of something far greater and more perfect for whatever we want most in life. If we are searching for meaning, for a miracle, then we just need to let Jesus in to our dreams so that He can make all things possible.

But if we do not believe in His love for us, then we are unlikely to see the miracles happening before us every single day.

How do we start seeing miracles? How do we bring faith back in to our world?

Believe in Love.

Expect nothing but for God to love you. For as Ben Rector says in his new song Extraordinary Magic, “Is love nothing short of a miracle happening over and over every day?” If you choose to believe in love, to seek it out in every person and every situation, then you will start to see little miracles happening everywhere you go. You will start to see how many things could not have happened if not for the love of God made manifest in His Holy Spirit, guiding hearts every day.

Life becomes beautiful in the light of love.

You see, miracles do happen, and they are not just meant for the person affected. Miracles are made for everyone to see God’s love acting in the world. I know this because the miracles I’ve most recently witnessed have given hope to some of the most hopeless feeling people I know. 

If we did not believe in the miracle, then we would not have seen the beauty of God’s grace in that place.

If we settle for The Cross, then we do not get to see The Resurrection.

If we settle for a lukewarm faith, then we cheat God the opportunity to give us more than we could ever imagine. If we stop dreaming, then the Dreamer cannot make our dreams come true. If we give up on what we have been hoping for our entire lives, then we refuse to allow God to love us.

All God wants to do is love us.

Will you let Him?