Consecration Anniversary

My friend Lauren and I had lunch on June 13, 2017. At that picnic table, she asked me if I would like to join her in a Marian Consecration. Preparation started that day, so I had to get moving. I had seen several of my Catholic friends with chain bracelets or Miraculous Medals to commemorate their Consecration to Jesus through Mary, and I had always wanted to participate in a Marian Consecration.

I could have waited until later, but I chose to take the leap then.

Without any real knowledge of what it would mean to give my life to Mary, I embarked on what would become one of the most significant adventures of my spiritual life.

Here are some of the things I came to understand more fully this past year, both intellectually and through beautiful little experiences.

Marian Consecration is not worshiping Mary. It is entrusting our whole lives to her, just as Jesus gave His very life to Mary. Marian Consecration is not just for those called to religious life. It is for every member of the Church, just as Mary is the Mother of all Jesus loves. Marian Consecration is not scary. It is an act of love, just as Jesus loved Mary forever.

By trusting Mary with our lives, we are imitating Christ’s love and respect for His Blessed Mother.

And that is a pretty safe place to be, both physically and spiritually.

It is no secret to my Dear Readers that I have ADHD. Because ADHD looks different in women like myself, there are many other small crosses associated with my mental “superpower.” I am often anxious, so much in fact that I will get extremely nauseous. If I am overstimulated, I start to lose my ability to hold anything together.

However, because I gave my life to Our Lady, I knew that I would be kept safe.

Starting in the middle of my consecration, I would flee to a chapel or Mass or the Grotto any time my mind could not handle the world around me. Much like calling my mother here on Earth, running to the Blessed Mother gave me rest.

Mary taught me how to rest in the midst of chaos, just as she did on the day Jesus carried His Cross.

But Marian Consecration is not just about entrusting our lives to Mary. As I said, Mary is the Mother of all whom Jesus loves. He loves everyone. Therefore, Mary loves every single person on Earth. So when we Consecrate ourselves to Mary, we are also entrusting all those we love in a special way to the woman who loved Jesus best.

By learning to love Mary, we also learn to love others.

Before my Marian Consecration, I loved others, but not nearly as deeply as I started to after the Feast of Our Lady of Mount Carmel. I would help others, but only as much as I thought I could help. I would pray for others, but only for the specific requests they presented to me. I would participate in devotionals, but only for my desires.

In the middle of my consecration, I started to pray for those I struggled with the most.

And I learned to forgive with my whole heart.

I have always struggled to maintain connections with other people. For the longest time, I believed that I was meant to only be a seed planter, meant to give others a taste of Christ’s love before they even knew His precious name. After my Marian Consecration, I started to create connections with people in a way that I never knew possible.

I could look at the Blessed Sacrament, and I could pray for souls I hardly knew.

The souls I wanted to befriend the most but struggled to understand were suddenly easy to communicate with. Communities I wanted to be a part of but didn’t know how to join were suddenly accessible to me.

Why?

Because I could love them as they are…as Christ loves them.

As I have said before, Christ’s love is not for us. It is for the whole world. Therefore, when we love one person, Christ’s love is made manifest in the world, and it goes out. As my friend Lauren and I continued to grow in love, we watched as our whole community started to change. In a beautiful domino effect, love went from lab to lab, floor to floor, department to department. Souls that had been struggling to understand one another or connect were suddenly participating in activities together, communicating with one another, and some were even able to forgive past transgressions.

Many people have mentioned that there is something special in our cohort, something that folks cannot put a finger to.

Many say that we will do something amazing.

One of the greatest experiences I have had following my consecration is watching the coalescence of everyone’s projects. I had a feeling that there would be a connection between the labs, but I never expected it to come in my short career here at Notre Dame.

Yet with little miracles every day, I watched as my hypothesis unfolded.

As souls grew in love for one another, unlikely collaborations appeared. In a way, the Blessed Mother gave us a physical sign of our spiritual gifts.

But the greatest gift that Marian Consecration gave me was a realization that I was never truly alone.

There was a moment in December when I was extremely lonely. The sky turned gray, and I did not know what to do. Because I had entrusted everything to Mary, I made the Sign of the Cross and made a little prayer. I asked Mary to send someone a dream. Not me because I knew that I would over interpret its meaning.

That night my mother had a dream of Saint Therese of Lisieux. Her picture was labeled so my mom would know who it was.

My mom had no clue I had made that prayer.

I am consecrated through Our Lady of Mount Carmel, the Patroness of the Carmelites. Saint Therese is a Carmelite.

Inspired by this little dream, I listened to Story of a Soul on audiotape as I worked in the lab. The number of times I teared up in joy as I listened to this sweet little soul say the same prayers I said, to hear the words of a Saint describing being distracted by small things, to hear the words of a Saint who felt the crosses of others…it was the greatest gift I could have ever receive.

I had a friend in Heaven, a friend that I could call upon at any time and know would understand my spiritual life.

In addition to Therese, I was introduced in a less miraculous way to Saint Teresa of Avila, another Carmelite. Her book The Interior Castle taught me that I was not a freak for some of the spiritual experiences I received. My dear friend Teresa taught me how to pray.

Together my spiritual sister and mother taught me how to live a life of prayer and love.

And my heaviest cross became light enough for me to smile in the face of it.

I could go on and on about the blessings Our Lady of Mount Carmel has given me, but in the interest of my Dear Readers’ time, I will conclude with my Consecration Prayer.

Dearest Carmel,

I, Felicity Rose Gemma Newton, renew my consecration to you today in thanksgiving for your aid on my journey Home to you. Again I renounce Satan and all of his evil ways. With your help, I will surely be left unscathed in the face of his wrath. With your counsel, I will run faster from him and closer to your sweet Son who loves me more than life.

Sweet Mary, you are both Our Mother and Our Sister. You humble yourself to leave your throne in Heaven to take care of your little ones. Help me to always remember that it is never a loss to love a little one. Help me to love those who feel loveless, those who lost their love, those who wish for nothing but love. Help me to love as you love. Lend me your heart and keep me in your sacred heart.

I gave you my whole life. From my work to my relationships, from my failures to my successes, from my tears to my laughter, you have a hand in it all. Help me to remember that The Resurrection follows The Cross in all things. May I always bring the Good News to those in strife, and may I always be willing to give up my own graces for their sake. 

I trust you, sweet Mother, with all my heart. You know what will keep my heart safe, and you have kept my heart safe all my life. May I love as you love forever.

Amen.