Tuesday, October 4, 2016

Present

Four weeks ago, I started a Koru Mindfulness workshop as part of my Reslife programming. Each sunday at 3pm, we would learn a new meditation skill and talk about how to live in the present moment. We were challenged each week to spend some amount of time just being in the moment.

We were called to be present.



The first week was a struggle to say the least. 

My mind went everywhere but the present moment. Until you are forced to really focus on the present moment, you never notice just how distracted you really are. This is issue is something that everyone struggles to see in their own lives. Without noticing it, your mind goes to two places that do not necessarily help you in the moment.



First, we all think about the future. 

Sometimes it is something as simple as our dinner plans, but sometimes we think far further in to the future. The issue with spending so much time focused on the future is that we may not notice the crucial foundation being laid down in the present moment.


For example, I used to plan out my experiments for the entire week. Following that, I would commit to meetings and other such things around my planned experiments. The problem with planning without a strong foundation in the present moment is that your plans may not go as expected.

My experiments failed.

And my entire week was suddenly filled with conflicts


Had I taken the experiments one at a time and put my full effort on each step, then I might have been more efficient, and I might have had time for all the things I wanted to do in addition to my lab work.


The second place our mind wanders is the past. 

Sometimes it is just remembering what we did in class, what happened earlier in the week, or a fond memory that we found on Timehop that morning. The unfortunate truth is that we often look to the negative part of our past. 

We ruminate on the things we should not have done, the embarrassing moments, and the person we used to be. 

What’s worse, we can do the same with those around us.

By being in the past instead of the present, we force these people to become the negative versions we created. We let our negative experiences with others overshadow our impression of them, and we rarely notice it happening. 

Think of a time when you used a negative stereotype and applied it to someone without even giving them a chance to be themselves.



What happens when you live in the present?


Like I said, the first week was difficult. I managed to notice when I made the mistake of leaving the present moment in my meditations, and I managed to acknowledge when I was planning too far ahead. 


My advisor acknowledged something that was going on in my life that even I didn’t notice before.

That's when I knew I had to start paying closer attention to what was really going on around me. Following that moment, I chose to take it upon myself to notice my thoughts and feelings as they came.


Two  incredible things happened when I started to let the moment in front of me become a priority: my experiments started to work and I was able to be vulnerable with people

What had dominated my future thoughts and my past thoughts was wiped away, and suddenly the issues that came from being outside of the present moment were gone.



I actually am starting to move forward in my project, and while its still in its preliminary stages, I can confidently say that I am learning the techniques in a far more mindful manner than before and the results are very clear. 

My mentee is even more successful because of this, and the fruits of her learning are incredible to see.



I also have started to notice the emotions and thoughts of those around me in a way I did not before. Any negative preconceptions I may have had about others are melted away as I stand beside them in the present moment and let them be who they are in this moment.

And by doing so, I am able to let people in that I never would have expected to be so thankful for.



Take time to think about the present. Take time to notice who you are, where you are, what is going on around you, and who are you really standing next beside.


And when it gets too hard, just ask yourself what Say Anything asks in their song “Do Better”


Where’s the present in the way that you present yourself?

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